Happy New Year

The new dawn, as the Mayans believed the Day following the “Day Out Of Time”
Is the beginning of the New Year, Happy New Year~!~

My day out of time was as intense for me as I can imagine.

It is interesting to me how this whole idea, of being the best one can be, can at times put you at risk in so many ways. I question myself wondering if I am strong enough am I mature enough am I in over my head. I have always felt that I was as tough as tough can be. Not in a physical way but in a personal way. This has given me the opportunity to go deeper into experience surrendering to natural time space and development. I have been able to do this without hesitation as I have always had the confidence that I would survive
Any consequence of my commitment to a life of being willing and able to risk all.

I can remember a conversation with myself as a young man. I had just experienced my first romantic heartbreak. My pain so grate for a moment I was on the line of conditioning my heart and mind to never allow myself to get so caught up in relationship that I could not pull out or be thrown out and set myself up for a repeat of the boyhood lamentations for an unrequited love.

I instead decided that I would never want to not be able, to give my all, to everything I do in my life.
Spirituality, relationship, family, ME, work, and the myriad of dynamics that present themselves through out my life. This has served me well and regardless of the fact that I have this time gone a bit too far. Far enough that I need to spend devoted time to rejuvenate, I will never give up giving life my all. I will however seek a path and an understanding of self that will help me to do so without the loss of self.