Happy Ending

As you set out for Ithaca 
hope your road is a long one,
full of adventure, full of discovery.
Laistrygonians, Cyclops,
Angry Poseidon-don't be afraid of them:
you'll never find things like that on your way
as long as you keep your thoughts raised high,
as long as a rare excitement
stirs your spirit and your body.
Laistrygonians, Cyclops,
wild Poseidon-you won't encounter
them
unless you bring them along inside your soul,
unless your soul sets them up in front of you.
Hope your road is a long one.
May there be many summer mornings when, 
with what pleasure, what joy, 
you enter harbors you're seeing for the first time; 
may you stop at Phoenician trading stations 
to buy fine things, 
mother of pearl and coral, amber and ebony,
sensual perfume of every kind- 
as many sensual perfumes as you can;
and may you visit many Egyptian cities 
to learn and go on learning from their scholars.
Keep Ithaca always in your mind.
Arriving there is what you're destined for. 
But don't hurry the journey at all. 
Better if it lasts for years, 
so you're old by the time you reach the island,
wealthy with all you've gained on the way, 
not expecting Ithaca to make you rich. 
Ithaca gave you the marvelous journey. 
Without her you wouldn't have set out. 
She has nothing left to give you now.
And if you find her poor, Ithaca won't have fooled you.
Wise as you will have become, so full of experience,
you'll have understood by then what these Ithacas mean.

Constantine P. Cavafy

I lay in completion of the next part of my journey. I think also of the days and weeks the people the experiences and the places that have passed before me all touching me, each leaving their unique pieces of life and riches that have filled my heart and my soul. I have only three hours to sleep before Sutan will take to me to the Phuket airport to catch my 7:30 flight back to the Oriental hotel in Bangkok. I leave Thailand as I arrived but not the same. He who journeys must change or he has not journeyed at all. I began in Thailand in the lap of luxury four days at the Oriental Hotel sitting and thinking and in retrospect in preparation for the journey that laid before me. Then traveling to Phuket where my life was a simple one of solitude. My days spent in meditation, prayer, study, exploration, swimming in the ocean and looking into the mirror of my soul. Kamala a small and simple village was the perfect setting, Rhonda’s bungalow the perfect retreat, Asa the perfect neighbor. I made friends with the locals without speaking even one word, but with smiles, bows, and light. I ate from the food carts that line the streets, at times sitting on the curb in front of the cart and eating my dinner of whole barbequed fish with my hands. Market days were a special treat as the variety of offerings were many and I could graze and feast among the community of the people I was growing to love and appreciate, for their simple and unfettered spirits the light in their eyes and the smiles that touched their hearts and mine. During this time the biggest part of my day was traveling a few miles up the road to the Buddhist monastery to pray and surround myself with the energy that the devotion of the monks creates, supporting me and reminding me of surrender focus and appreciation for the many blessings of life. Destiny was to open for me the unexpected that comes to those who empty and follow what ever path that should appear without expectations or needs. I met Ian at the suggestion of Mark as he and I spoke through the internet. Ian is a long time friend of Mark and Rhonda’s, as I have previously described a most interesting man, his life a book of chapters most of us can only dream of. Ian is connected to the heart of Phuket having lived here for many years, if there is such a thing as a concierge for Phuket it would be Ian. It was after our first meeting that my path through Phuket would change. I had an on the edge of disaster motorcycle accident, putting a new spin on my direction and focus. I was a wounded bird my face legs and arms stripped of flesh leaving me a new process to add to my day tending to my wounds. For that first week after my accident I practically bathed in Hydrogen Peroxide and Iodine. It was in this state that I met Sally and Sue, during a dinner outing with Ian. We quickly became friends they invited me to stay with them in their new home. In fact I was blessed to help them with the move in process. Angels that provided me a sanctuary to heal and to share in life. I like to think that I was in some way an angel to them as well. I moved into the grand house on the hill overlooking Chalong Bay, the view was as good as it gets as was the company. Again I was in the lap of luxury, no more need to eat on the street as Duan was there to cook for me or ride the motorbike as Sutan was there to drive me wherever I wanted to go at any time. They introduced me to their friends providing me with yet more opportunity to take in the riches of life through the beauty of human spirit. We shared a common reverence for God Sue a Buddhist and Sally a spiritual bubble of light. All of my needs provided for and still space for my continued focus on the mirror that called me to look so deeply to emptiness and yet at the same time filling my heart to the point that I wonder if the heart has any limits, I think not. The nearby town just at the base of the hillside of my new home is as Kamala a mixture of Buddhist and Muslims, the mornings filled with the sounds of life that reflect the cultures of Thailand. The Cantor singing at sunrise the roosters crowing but now as I am high above the sounds all rising to a splendor that is impossible to describe. I can only say that if you want to sleep past sunrise in this house you will need block out curtains closed doors sleeping pills or a least some ear plugs. I love it keeping the door to my bedroom open at all times. There is no curtain and the door is not a door but a 20 foot sliding wall that disappears into itself so that you feel as if you are sleeping under the stars. A very dramatic setting to say the least, laying with the outside in and the inside out as the rain pounds the world around you. Sally is in London this morning and Sue is sound asleep. I am deeply sad that I do not have the opportunity to look Sally in the eyes and give her the biggest hug in the world in an attempt to express how magical my last 13 days in Phuket have been as a result of her huge heart, does the heart have limits, I think not. Thank you Sally I am touched deeply and I will both leave a huge piece of my heart here as well as take away possibly more than my heart can hold, does the heart have limits? I think not. I was able to connect with Sue spending these last few days together getting to know one another one to one she calls me Jeffrey and I kiss her on both cheeks. Saying goodbye and thanking her with all my heart creating closure at the same time an opening to a lifelong friendship. As I lay here soaking up all that I can in my few remaining moments, Harley one of two of Sally’s dogs is laying beside me, he is a big dog stretched out he is as long as I am tall, and Shummie the other of the two is sleeping at my feet. The dogs are not allowed to sleep on the bed but I make an exception as the two of them miss Sally so much they will not leave my side and I too find comfort with them by my side. It is now time to get ready Sutan has just given me my 5:am knock on the door. I have just 30 min. before my departure. I rush through my last minute details emails at finial loading the suitcases. Sutan brings me a cup of coffee and then stands just outside on the deck smoking and watching me in my process, I can only imagine what he is thinking. He speaks no English and yet even in the propriety of the servant relationship I feel we have become friends. When we go anywhere together he walks behind me a comfortable 8 feet close enough to not lose me and to be at my hand should I need any assistance. He likes ice cream and so do I. It was just yesterday the staff understood that I was leaving. Duan made such a fuss I think she thought I was to stay forever. We took pictures of each other and we laughed even though we could not speak. Seeking out Sue to help translate they told me that I must return soon even a couple of months away is too long. I promise Duan I will return, hopefully many times.
Closing my bags, I stand in the middle of my room and I say out loud my personal prayer, three times four times as I turn to face each of the four directions. “ Thank you for your Blessings Keep us Healthy, Keep us Wise and guide us to the light so we may better serve.” I can feel the big Buddha on the mountain just behind me smiling down upon me remembering our sacred kiss. Sutan begins to shuttle my bags to the car, I take one last look around then join him outside, but first I gather a fist full of incense a stick for each of those who make this house a home and one for me. Lighting the incense I go to Ganesh where he sits upon the altar that both blesses and guards the entrance to the property, I light the two candles that are ever present, holding the incense in my hands in prayer position close to my heart I repeat three time my prayer, asking for blessing for Sally Sue and the family and the home they have created. My heart is exploding my tears make it difficult for me to speak. I place the incense into the holder and back away leaving the candles lit I join Sutan in the car and we silently drive away. The sun is just beginning to rise the roads are beginning to come alive I see bar girls on scooters on their way home smiling at me as we pass possibly hoping for a last minute fare. Monks are on their morning rounds, I ask Sutan to stop, so that I can give my offering humbly and receive a blessing for my continued journey/life. As we drive the 45min to the airport I try to witness all that I have gained and all that I have shared thus far. I feel I have found my culture in Italy, I look forward to my return to Venice in just one week, I feel I have found my spirit Thailand, the spirit of the universe in palatable here and I have affirmed my devotion to the way of the Buddha, and I have found my home, buried deep in my heart. Remembering the famous lines of Dorothy as she tapped her heels together repeating three times “There’s no Place like Home, There’s no Place like Home, There’s no Place like Home” and like Dorothy I will wake up in hours in my own bed in the home of my heart that I have created and co-created with my partner lover and friend and wife Debbie and my own little Toto…….. Maggie. And with that a “Very Happy Ending.”